Stardate 4672.826A.S, Freeport 6, Tau-29. Cruise speed engaged and a course plotted to the Coronado system. If all goes well, I should be there in... 7 hours. All green across the board, with fuel at 73 percent. The Samura job has been completed and payment should be arriving at my account shortly. Well... Assuming the contact is still alive after the exchange, and the Samura counter-intelligence hasn't picked him off for dealing in illegal goods and bribery. Or perhaps the Naval Forces have noticed the suspicious activity on the radar and scanned his cargo as he was moving it towards the Skinkaku. Or perhaps the Kempeitai had their finger on the pulse since the start, and were waiting to nail him in the perfect moment.... Fuck. It felt off from the moment I met him. Why do I even bother to deal with this crap? Why do I let my desperation get the best of me? There's a fair amount of honest work waiting at the Barrier. Sure, they don't pay as well, but they ain't as stressful either. It's the last thing I need right now.
And I need to stop my habit of making these logs full of paranoid ramblings. This is not the reason why I decided to start recording them. Idiot... Computer, end log.
Sender: Unknown
Location: Unknown
Neural Net Version 1.4237
Stardate 4673.826A.S, Barrier Station, Coronado. Or home. If I can call it like that. More like a stop on a path that never ends. But it doesn't matter... The Samura contact has paid for my services in full so the risk has paid off after all. A rare spot of luck. This should cover at least a couple of months of my rent and ship maintenance. A few more jobs like this, and I'll be able to afford an upgrade to his heap of junk I call my ship.. I should switch to an Eagle perhaps, or even a Sabre. Damn, even a Dromedary sounds like a dream at this point. But I'm forgetting priorities. First the electro-coupling on the aft thruster, then the shield modification as it's leaking radiation again. Or else I might as well send it to the nearest scrapyard immediately. And I should definitely start searching for better accommodation than this roach infested rock. And I shouldn't forget the Neural Net terminal that's been freezing for the last...
Look at me. At it again. I really need to stop with unnecessary talk. Computer, delete previous entry. Or actually, don't. Perhaps it will be nice to one day remember what kind of person I was. A normal human being. A bit chatty and annoying. But myself. This is who I am.
So, back to the topic. This week I have achieved a breakthrough in... Nothing. And you know what else I did? Nothing. Sure, I managed to cover a few bills and I don't have to worry about food and fuel for some time. But that's... Nothing.
My disease has been slowly progressing and I can feel its effects more and more. It started with back pain, spread onto the head and neck, and I don't even want to start on my mental health. Each day I feel less and less like myself. Like there's an intruder in my body, slowly taking over and pushing me somewhere in the back. I can see it happening, but I am unable to intervene. An observer in my own life. A weak idiot with no willpower to change something.
So, what was on my list for the past week? Start reading the books about genetic mutations and figure out how I can slow this down... I was supposed to make a contact with the Cryer as well to see when the new HIF-2α drugs will be available to the public. Perhaps I could expedite the process with a bribe or two. But of course, I didn't even start on either. Fuck it, just write it down as the tasks for next week.
And... That's it. I guess. What else did I want to write down? Right, contact Dr. Robinson on the Carlisle. Make a soup with the synth-carrots as their expire next week. Pick up mail at the office. And try not to die, yeah? Yeah... Sounds easy.
Computer, end log.
Sender: Unknown
Location: Unknown
Neural Net Version 1.4237
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